Can’t Drive 55
First it was Shedeur, now it’s Myles Garrett. My guy was clocked going 100 mph in a 60 mph zone in his Ferrari… three years after flipping his Porsche multiple times. Since 2017, he’s racked up eight speeding tickets with the Browns. Myles, slow down, bro, you’re a future Hall of Famer, not a Fast & Furious extra.
Seahawks Fans Are #1… To Someone
At least to Maxx Crosby and ex-Seahawk QB Geno Smith. Some fans held up a sign calling Geno a bigger bust than JaMarcus Russell. Geno responded with the classic double-bird salute.
The Golden Child
Packers rookie Matthew Golden used his signing bonus to buy his grandma a brand-new house. Love it. Of course, he did. He went to UT. Hook ’Em.
Hello Darkness, My Old Friend
Remember Antonio Brown losing his mind when the NFL told him he couldn’t wear his outdated helmet? Well, apparently, Aaron Rodgers is this close to being the sequel. He still hasn’t found a helmet he likes. He says, ‘It looks like a damn spaceship.’ Don’t think Aaron will pull an AB… but there’s something to be said for feeling comfortable in your gear.
C’mon Man!
CeeDee Lamb didn’t even suit up against the Rams, but still got smoked by a ref. While celebrating on the sidelines, Lamb caught a surprise shoulder check from the zebra and both hit the turf. To top it all off, the ref didn’t just lay him out, CeeDee got slapped with a 15-yard unsportsmanlike penalty for “contacting the official.” Now the league might even hit him with a fine. Talk about getting tackled twice.
Use the savings for brisket nachos and cerveza!🍕🍺
All paper draft boards are now 20% off in our Fire Sale section. Loaded with last year’s draft boards (now upgraded with 2025 rookies) and T-shirts for men and women while they last.
We’ll be back next time with more hot takes, cold cuts, and fantasy advice that probably won’t hold up in court. Looking for the ultimate fantasy football draft board? Commish Kit has everything you need—poster kits, stand-up corrugated boards, and a digital draft board so slick, your league might actually think you’re organized this year.
If you enjoyed the blog, don’t ghost us, scroll down and sign up for our summer newsletter (June through August). It’s packed with fantasy football tips, pop culture takes, exclusive coupon codes, and just enough memes and cartoons to make your league group chat jealous.
