Aliens, Lizard People, Jerry’s $12 Billion Soap Opera, and Fantasy Football
The U.S. government casually dropped the news that four types of aliens are living among us. Because this is 2025 and nothing surprises anyone anymore, the internet barely flinched. Furthermore we already knew the Royal Family were lizard people and Joe Rogan is a CIA sleeper agent. Meanwhile McDonald’s and Wendy’s are crying into their hash browns because nobody wants a $9 breakfast sandwich. And Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce broke the entire internet — literally. Fantasy football draft season has never felt more chaotic or more entertaining.
Blank Space, YouTube Glitch — Taylor Swift Breaks the Internet
Taylor Swift hopped on the New Heights podcast with Travis Kelce and his brother Jason Kelce. Because she was breaking down Cover 2 coverages like a defensive coordinator and screaming when the Chiefs drafted Texas wide receiver Xavier Worthy — Hook ‘Em — the football world lost its mind.
13 million views later YouTube crashed. One million live viewers and the stream glitched out like dial-up internet in 2002. Furthermore the NFL is planning to stream Chiefs vs Chargers Week 1 in Brazil on YouTube. If one podcast appearance crashed the platform, the NFL might want more duct tape before trusting YouTube with a live game broadcast.
Fantasy football implications: Xavier Worthy landing with the Chiefs and Patrick Mahomes is one of the most exciting rookie fantasy football situations of the 2025 draft class. Because Worthy ran a 4.21 forty at the combine and now plays with the best quarterback in football, his upside as a deep threat and PPR contributor is enormous. Furthermore Taylor Swift’s endorsement of the Chiefs offense — however unintentional — confirms that Kansas City remains the most talked about team in the NFL.
Jerry’s $12 Billion Soap Opera
Jerry Jones told the world what everyone already knew — the Cowboys are a soap opera 365 days a year and when things get slow Jerry stirs it up. Because water is wet and Jerry Jones loves attention, this statement was the least surprising news of the week.
However the soap opera is worth $12.8 billion making the Cowboys the most valuable franchise in the NFL. As a result Jerry can buy whatever he wants — except a Super Bowl appearance. Moreover Micah Parsons is still waiting for his contract extension while Jerry stirs the pot on national television.
Fantasy football implications: The Cowboys’ ongoing drama directly affects fantasy football values. Because Micah Parsons’ contract situation remains unresolved, IDP managers should monitor his status closely before drafting him. Furthermore CeeDee Lamb remains one of the most valuable fantasy football wide receivers regardless of the Cowboys’ front office chaos — great players produce even on soap opera franchises.
Have Clipboard Will Fight — Michael Penix Jr. and the Falcons
Falcons rookie quarterback Michael Penix Jr. got into it with the Titans during joint practice. Because trash talk led to a long bomb to Ray-Ray McCloud which led to a fight breaking out, Penix got dumped and Drake London and the boys jumped in to defend their guy. As a result the Falcons rookie showed he’s not afraid of the moment — which is exactly what you want to see from a first-year quarterback trying to earn his team’s respect.
Meanwhile Kirk Cousins is bubble-wrapped on the sideline collecting $27.5 million just waiting to be traded when some unlucky starter goes down somewhere. Nice gig, Captain Kirk.
Fantasy football implications: Michael Penix Jr. is worth monitoring as a deep league quarterback option if Kirk Cousins gets traded or injured. Because Penix showed competitive fire and arm talent in joint practices, his development trajectory is worth tracking through training camp. Furthermore if Cousins moves on, Penix becomes an immediate fantasy football starter with massive upside.
Dolphins Equal Tuna Casserole
The Lions absolutely bullied the Dolphins in joint practice. Because one Lions linebacker said “I don’t know if they practice how we practice” and then the Dolphins proceeded to prove him right, Miami’s preparation came under serious scrutiny. Furthermore Tyreek Hill is still unhappy with trade rumors swirling. If this situation drags into the season Hill might pull a hold-in special.
Tua Tagovailoa however remains cool as ever. “I think we’re in a really good spot.” Sure, bro. Just keep swimming.
Fantasy football implications: Tyreek Hill’s unhappiness is a significant fantasy football red flag. Because unhappy receivers historically see reduced targets and effort, Hill’s fantasy value takes a meaningful hit if the trade situation isn’t resolved before Week 1. Moreover Dolphins skill players across the board carry uncertainty until the Hill situation is settled. As a result fantasy managers should wait on all Miami receivers until there is clarity.
Fantasy Football Draft Boards — Commish Kit
Because all this NFL drama means one thing — fantasy football draft season is here and your league needs a draft board. Commish Kit has been making fantasy football draft boards since 2002, shipping from Austin, Texas. Furthermore every board ships free via UPS Ground with a 30-day money-back guarantee.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Is Xavier Worthy worth drafting in fantasy football?
Yes. Because Xavier Worthy runs a 4.21 forty and now plays with Patrick Mahomes in Kansas City, his upside as a deep threat and PPR contributor is enormous. Furthermore landing with the Chiefs — the most efficient offense in football — gives Worthy an immediate path to fantasy football production as a rookie wide receiver.
Should I draft Tyreek Hill in fantasy football?
Tyreek Hill’s trade rumors and reported unhappiness make him a risky fantasy football investment heading into 2025. Because unhappy receivers historically see reduced effort and targets, fantasy managers should consider waiting on Hill until his situation is resolved. As a result his average draft position may drop giving savvy managers a potential value pick if he commits to Miami.
Is Michael Penix Jr. worth drafting in fantasy football?
Michael Penix Jr. is worth monitoring as a deep league quarterback option. Because he showed competitive fire and arm talent in joint practices against the Titans, his development trajectory is worth tracking through training camp and preseason games. Furthermore if Kirk Cousins is traded Penix becomes an immediate fantasy football starter with significant upside.
Is CeeDee Lamb still a good fantasy football pick despite Cowboys drama?
Yes. Because great players produce even on dysfunctional franchises, CeeDee Lamb remains one of the most valuable fantasy football wide receivers regardless of Jerry Jones’ soap opera front office. Furthermore Lamb has proven he can put up elite numbers with or without a consistent supporting cast around him.
What is the best fantasy football draft board for a 10-team family league?
Commish Kit’s 10-Team 20-Round Draft Board with Bye Weeks is perfect for family leagues. Because it includes 387 color-coded player labels, 2026 NFL bye weeks, and free shipping, it gives every manager in the room a clear view of every pick in real time.
How long has Commish Kit been making fantasy football draft boards?
Commish Kit has been making fantasy football draft boards since 2002 and is based in Austin, Texas. As a result the brand has become the go-to draft board for fantasy leagues across the country, as featured on Thrillist.
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We’ll be back next time with more hot takes, cold cuts, and fantasy advice that probably won’t hold up in court. Looking for the ultimate fantasy football draft board? Commish Kit has everything you need—poster kits, stand-up corrugated boards, and a digital draft board so slick, your league might actually think you’re organized this year.
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